The Golden Rule of Supermarket Shopping

was broken by the Wallace household this weekend.  The Golden Rule of Supermarket Shopping is never, ever go to any supermarket under any circumstances on a Saturday.  Because Saturday is when all the stupid people go shopping.  I feel I am qualified to say this with a modicum of authority because I used to do my shopping on a Saturday.  Many people who shop in supermarkets on a Saturday are usually there because they work all week and they have no other time to go.  In other words they are there because they have to be.  They would much rather be somewhere else doing something else such as  walking on broken glass or eating hot coals, that sort of thing.  So it rather goes without saying that they want to get round the place, buy what they need to in the shortest amount of time possible and their patience and tolerance limit is set close to zero.  This of course makes them stupid.  Supermarkets are designed so you can't get round them quickly; the whole idea is that you stop and browse.  There is a whole branch of psychology dedicated to the design of supermarkets, the layout, product placement, the aroma, even the music played - all with one goal:  to make you stay there as long as possible and purchase as much as possible.  I have table decorations that I have never used but at the time of purchase I wondered how I had ever lived without.  (Incidentally I think the folks at Ikea must be PhD professors in shop layout the amount of unwanted stuff I buy there.)

Of course, when it comes to shopping on a Saturday all this psychology is a waste of time.  The only thing you need to do to make people spend longer in the supermarket is to add a scattering of senior citizens, men with prams and women with prams and a mobile 'phone.  You'll never find your way out!